How to recognize and relate to "the undercurrent"
Have you ever been in meetings where all seems calm on the surface, but where you felt the clear and present danger of speaking out? These are meetings in which the group is stuck. In this blog, I want to zoom into ‘the undercurrent’ of our interactions and find out how to recognize it and how to relate to it in a healthy way so the group can get unstuck and move forward.
This blog is based on the article De onderstoom boven (2010) by Jan Piet van Deene, the director of the IOD institute in Holland and a great inspiration to me. You can read the full article in Dutch here.
The undercurrent
I love this quote from RD Laing:
They are pretending.
They pretend that they are not pretending.
If I show them that I know, I will break the rules and they will punish me.
I have to pretend with them and pretend that I don’t know that they are pretending.
I understand this in this way: sometimes we pretend that we are having an open and constructive discussion about a decision which has to be taken and plans to be made. Everyone knows there is an elephant in the room, but we choose to ignore it because it is too unsafe to talk about it. Instead of addressing the real issue, we keep focusing on the topic at hand - the decisions and plans. As a result, we continue to turn in circles. Not addressing what is in the ‘undercurrent’ causes the group to get stuck.
How can you recognize that the undercurrent is at work? What are the sources for the undercurrent to grow strong and what can you do to get the group unstuck?
How can you recognize that the undercurrent is at work?
Here are some recognizable examples:
There is a lot of talk going on in the informal circuit. In the formal circuit, the issue is not addressed.
Uncertainties and vulnerabilities are not shared. The group seems to consist of superwomen and supermen.
The group seems to be stuck in an artificial harmony. It’s not OK to disagree.
The group keeps changing the topic, so it can’t get to the bottom of an issue and make decisions.
People feel they have to behave incongruently to how they really feel. For example, laughing when they are not really having fun.
Energy levels in the group are very low or very high.
Members feel a strain in their muscles, get a headache or have other physical complaints.
I’m sure you can come up with more examples.
What are the causes for the undercurrent and how can we relate to it? According to Jan Piet, there are three.
1. Within the group, there are themes which are considered illegitimate. People fear that raising the issue comes at a cost. The result is “groupthink”. People are afraid to disagree and an artificial harmony is installed. In case there is a very dominant leader, groupthink is further enhanced. Sometimes there are topics that really are off limits. Then punishment for the individual is a real risk. For example, I once dared to raise an issue with my CEO and found myself fired soon afterward :-) In many cases, however, an issue is only perceived as illegitimate. When management realizes certain issues are considered illegitimate, part of the answer is to bring the issue into the formal circuit and allowing dialogue about it.
2. Thoughts and feelings members of the group have concerning a task, a situation, a loss … are being suppressed, because they cause too much tension. This is something that often happens unconsciously. What we then see is projection. This can be in the form of a group identifying a scapegoat. Someone who gets all the negative feelings projected in him or her. He or she then is seen as weak, mean, insecure, angry, negative or whatever feeling the group members cannot deal with within themselves. Another example of projection is the group splitting in two. Within the group we see two opposing sides: for example, the ones who are for a new turn or the ones who are against; or another example, the people who are in favor of getting on with it, the ones who prefer analyzing and thinking things through; … A final example of projecting is the “us versus them” phenomenon. All the negative feelings are projected outside of the group into another group in the larger system: another department, the competition, … In case of projection, it is important to make people conscious of the what is going on. Listening with great empathy, creating an appreciative atmosphere allowing people to “share, compare and find out” is helpful. Being able to contain the tensions which are spoken out is then an important ability.
3. People are having experiences for which they don’t have words yet. Members of the group are experiencing things which they cannot logically explain with the current frames of reference. Learning is imminent, but not yet there. In this case, it is important to create the space for people to dream about a possible future and connect with each other through he dreaming they do as a group together. Going through such a process allows them to get excited about this possible future they see before them. It creates the energy for action.
If you recognize any of the dynamics going in your organization and you feel stuck, please contact me on Lesley@VanlekeAdvies.be or call me 0478 51 96 66.